4 Types of Toxic Relationships That Are Holding You Back
You’re trying to take your life to the next level but you just can’t seem to motivate yourself to take the next step. You’ve been thinking about that life you want to have but for some reason, your vision is getting a little cloudy. What you wanted so bad that you could almost taste it is now slipping away into an afterthought. You want to get your drive back but you just don’t know where to start. More importantly – you don’t know where you went wrong.
What you don’t realize is, it may be because of a toxic relationship you’re harboring in your life.
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is underestimating the influence that other people can have over you and how it can affect your energy. The truth is, words do affect you; no matter how much you try to play it off.
For this reason, you need to make sure that the people around you speak positivity into your life. But first, you need to get rid of the toxic relationships in your life. Mainly these four:
1. Toxic Friendships
I’m not talking about the “friends” who talk behind your back or betray you in some obvious way. I’m talking about the friends who don’t have your best interest at heart. The friends who don’t support you or celebrate your wins, but are quick to offer criticism. The friends who ask for discounts on your work instead of paying you what you are owed. And worst of all, the friends who encourage you to remain stagnant and be complacent.
One of the most important things you’ll learn is that your environment influences your mindset.
If you surround yourself with people who make you feel like it’s okay to be lazy, you’ll become very lazy. If you surround yourself with people who don’t support you or ask for discounts, you’ll begin to doubt yourself. If you surround yourself with people who don’t push you to do your best, you will succumb to doubt and you’ll never achieve your full potential.
2. Toxic Family Members
Unfortunately, sometimes our own family could be the ones hurting us. There are many ways that your family members can stunt your growth without you even realizing.
For example, if someone in your family always discourages you from pursuing something you want to do, you have to accept that they may not have your best interest at heart.
Many times, people who care about us, hold us back in this way because they couldn’t see themselves doing the things you may aspire to. Sometimes it’s just a case of people projecting their shortcomings onto you.
They may have good intentions, but that doesn’t mean you should listen to them.
3. Toxic Romantic Relationships
This includes non-exclusive relationships as well.
Ask yourself:
Is my partner pushing me to be the best version of myself or am I turning into somebody I don’t recognize? Am I growing as a person? Am I becoming somebody I love and respect or someone I never thought I’d be? Are my needs being met or neglected?
In order to elevate to the plane of success you desire, you need to make sure your partner encourages you to do whatever is necessary to get there. You shouldn’t have to choose between them and your goals. It’s easy to get caught up in another person and forget about yourself or put your dreams on hold to please them. The right partner won’t make you feel like you have to do that.
On Non-exclusive relationships:
Despite the fact that you don’t have a title, you’re still very much invested. You are investing your time and energy – two things you cannot get back – into something that may not produce a return on your investment. You will also be affected by the other person’s actions in the same way that you would if you were in a relationship. You may try to remind yourself that you shouldn’t feel this way, (or even worse, be reminded by the other person that you shouldn’t), but you will.
You are a young #Girlboss in the making, and your limited time and energy is being invested into something that isn’t yielding any results. If someone advised you to invest in a stock that you knew would fail or had doubts about, you wouldn’t do it.
Your time and energy is a limited currency, be as wise in spending it as you would with your money.
4. Toxic Relationship with Yourself
Imagine this:
You have an idea for a business you want to start based on something you’re very passionate about. You fantasize about it all the time and even begin doing research on how you can start. You reach a point where you’re ready to move forward and turn your dream into a reality. Suddenly, the crippling feeling of doubt creeps in. You tell yourself that no one will like your idea and you’ll never get any customers and your business will fail. You think your idea is silly so you dismiss it altogether and go about living life as you did before you began to dream.
Ask yourself:
In that moment, who told you that your business would never be successful? Who told you your idea was stupid?
You did.
You killed your dream before you did so much as write down your ideas. You convinced yourself that nobody would like your idea. Nobody even learned of your idea yet. You told yourself that it wasn’t worth pursuing.
What would happen if you actually chased your dream and started your business?
Don’t you want to find out? Are you so afraid of failure that you’re content with thinking “what if” all the time?
What if it DID work out? What if that idea will help manifest everything you’ve ever wanted?
You can either be your greatest obstacle or your greatest strength.
Now that you know about these types of unhealthy relationships you can focus on getting them out of your life. Share this post to help others who may be struggling with this too!